He Gave It All Away
by tinylexie
Summary: Lucius does not approve of Severus's relationship with Lily.


**Author's Note****: This story has jumps in time. It begins in Lucius's fifth year and Severus's first year at Hogwarts, and it ends during the events of **_**Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows**_**.**

* * *

Lucius, to put it simply, liked to eavesdrop. He had to know everything. If there was something going on in Hogwarts that he didn't know about, no matter how trivial that something might be, then Lucius wasn't happy. Knowledge, after all, was power; and Lucius intended to one day be very powerful.

So, of course, Lucius knew all about the relationship between Severus and Lily.

Severus, even during his first year, was crafty and subtle. He could sneak around very well in the shadows. But none of that had stopped Lucius from finding out about Lily.

As mentioned above, Lucius liked to know everything about everyone, but he was especially interested in Severus's affairs because he had taken quite the shine to the younger boy. Severus was clearly brilliant. He knew curses that most seventh years could never think of, much less perform. And it had not taken long for his Potion skills to become legendary.

Lucius, also very skilled with curses and Potions and also rather brilliant if he said so himself, could not help but notice Severus's potential. And Lucius, contrary to popular belief that he only cared about himself, could be quite the protector. Of course, he only cared to protect those that he respected; but if Lucius respected you, then he was going to look after you. Even if you didn't want him looking after you.

Since Lucius respected Severus, he was going to look after the younger boy. So, of course, it did not take long for Lucius to find out about Lily.

Despite what most people thought, blood wasn't the most important thing in the world to Lucius. That's not to say that it wasn't important to him, because it clearly was. But even more than blood, Lucius valued intelligence. Lucius, therefore, did not lose his respect for Severus just because of Lily.

Besides, it had quickly become clear to Lucius very quickly that Lily was rather brilliant herself. It really was a shame that she was a Mudblood. Not that Lucius ever called her that in front of Severus, of course. Lucius respected Severus way too much for that.

Still, though, Lucius did not approve of Severus's relationship with Lily. There was just something _wrong_ about their relationship.

"I do not understand your affections for Lily Evans," Lucius told Severus bluntly one night when they were alone in the Slytherin common room.

Severus was clearly taken by surprise. He had thought that none of his housemates knew about Lily.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Lucius," Severus recovered quickly. "Lily Evans is of _inferior_ blood. I would _never_ associate with someone like her."

Lucius smirked slightly. It was clear that the younger boy wanted to fit in badly with the rest of the Slytherins for him to say such a thing about the girl that he not just liked but liked a lot.

"Don't bother trying to lie to me, Severus," Lucius smiled. "I've seen you with that girl, many times. And it's clear to me that you want to do more than just associate with her. Not that I can blame you, of course. She is very intelligent and rather pretty, after all. What I don't understand, however, is why you are so _ashamed _of her."

"I am _not_ ashamed of Lily," Severus snapped.

"Then why are you trying to hide your relationship with her from us?"

"You know why, Lucius. We both know what it means to be a Slytherin. Slytherins don't accept witches like Lily."

"Then it is truly a shame that you were placed in Slytherin."

"I am proud to be a Slytherin," Severus insisted. "There are many things about this house that I _do_ like."

"But there are other things about this house that you could do without," Lucius said in a matter-of-fact voice.

"Yes."

"It still is a shame, though," Lucius commented, "that you feel like you have to deny Lily Evans. Of course, most of the other Slytherins would not be as understanding as I am about all this. Perhaps you are afraid of them. Perhaps you care more about how your housemates think of you than you do about the girl you are always sneaking around to see."

"That's not true," Severus snarled. "Lily is _everything_ to me. Everything."

"Then prove it."

"I can't."

"Why? Because you're scared?"

"I'm not scared for myself," Severus explained. "I can take a beating."

That much was true. James Potter and Sirius Black seemed to relish in tormenting Severus. James Potter especially was very jealous of the fact that Lily liked Severus instead of him. No doubt the fool of a boy thought that insulting and hexing Severus enough times would be able to prove to Lily Evans that she was being friends with the wrong boy. If Lily Evans abandoned Severus because of that, then she was just as much as a fool as James Potter was.

"It's Lily I worry about," Severus continued. "I know how our housemates think about witches like her. They're already against her. I don't want to draw any more attention to her. I don't want her getting hurt because of me."

"How noble of you," Lucius remarked. "I just hope that Lily Evans is worth all this."

"She is," Severus insisted. "She has always been there for me whenever I have needed her."

"But will that always be the case?" Lucius pressed. "We are surrounded by war, Severus. The Dark Lord is growing stronger with each passing day, and people will go to any lengths to save themselves.

"And loyalty is such a fickle thing. Loyalty only lasts for as long as it serves a purpose. Perhaps there will come a day when Lily Evans will no longer see the purpose in being loyal to you. You are, after all, a Slytherin; and she a Gryffindor. Surely she must view us Slytherins the same way that we view those like her."

"Well, she doesn't care much for the antics of Avery and Mulciber," Severus admitted. "But that doesn't mean anything. Even _you_ don't approve of everything that those two do."

"It's not their actions I disapprove of," Lucius sneered. "I merely disapprove of their foolishness and their inability to be subtle. But the real point of all this is that Lily Evans doesn't approve of _your_ friends. You do consider Avery and Mulciber to be your friends, don't you, Severus?"

"Of course I do," Severus mumbled.

"And Lily Evans doesn't care much for them?"

"No."

"And she also doesn't care much for any of us Slytherins, not just Avery and Mulciber?"

"No."

"And we Slytherins don't really care much for her and the rest of her type either?"

"No."

"Then mark my words, Severus," Lucius breathed, "there will come a day when you must each choose a side. Which side will _you_ choose? Which side will _she_ choose? I doubt it will be the same side."

"I understand where you're coming from, Lucius," Severus replied, "but you're wrong about Lily. She's different from everyone else."

"You may think that now," Lucius responded, "but I can guarantee that one day you will each break the other's heart. You two view the world too _differently_ for what you have with her to last forever. Let go of her, Severus, before you lose everything."

"That's not going to happen," Severus insisted, a trace of both anger and determination in his voice. "You'll see."

* * *

It did not come as a surprise to Lucius when he heard that Lily Evans was now Lily Potter. The girl really was fickle. To toss Severus aside was one thing. But to toss Severus aside for _James Potter_ of all people was another thing.

* * *

Lucius looked at Severus, who was looking at the freshly burned Dark Mark on his left arm. They were in the main drawing room of Malfoy Manor.

"Are you proud of that mark?" Lucius asked.

"Yes," Severus answered, "I am now fighting to purify our kind." His voice, though, lacked a certain conviction.

"That's good to hear," Lucius spoke. "I would hate to think that you took the Mark just out of anger towards James Potter."

"James Potter means _nothing_ to me," Severus snarled.

"That's good to hear as well."

"I know what you're trying to get at, Lucius, and let me tell you right now I don't want to talk about it. Ever. And I mean that."

"That's fine with me, just as long as your feelings for _her _don't interfere with your duties to the Dark Lord."

"I have _no_ feelings for Lily Potter."

"I'm glad to hear that."

"You can drop the sarcasm, Lucius."

"And you can drop the lies, Severus," Lucius said. "I can see the way that your eyes light up with an emotion that is neither anger nor hatred whenever her name is mentioned. You best not let the Dark Lord see that. If he doesn't kill you, he will use your feelings for her to _break_ you. And I don't want to see that happen to you. Severus, you truly do deserve so much better than what you're allowing yourself to have."

"I knew you wouldn't understand," Severus responded, "but I do appreciate that you've never said anything about Lily to anyone."

"And I never will. I will let your demons be your own business for now on. Just promise me that you will try to take care of yourself."

Severus waved his hand impatiently, even though it was clear by the look on his face that he appreciated Lucius's concern, even if the older wizard did sometimes have a unique way of expressing that concern.

* * *

It did not come as a surprise to Lucius when he heard that Severus had not been loyal to the Dark Lord since he had made the decision to go after Lily Potter. Severus, after all, had never been able to let go of his love (love really was such a silly notion) for Lily.

It truly was a tragedy. Lily had never cared about Severus as much as he had cared about her. Lily had been Severus's everything, while to Lily, Severus had just been a boy that she had liked for a time. Lily had not been able to accept Severus for who he really was.

It truly was a tragedy. Severus had given away _everything_ for Lily, his heart, his happiness, his hopes for a fulfilling future, even his own life.

And what had Lily ever given to Severus in return? Nothing. Nothing but an unforgiving heart that had refused to bend in any way for a lost, lonely boy who had only wanted someone to care about him.


End file.
